Tuesday, December 31, 2013

Completion, Creation & Celebration

In December of 2010 my family began what we call a "completion, creation & celebration" dinner. For two years we did this with the community of like minded people that we had created in Montreal as a holiday party. Last year I don't remember doing it. Tonight we brought it back. 

Tonight, December 31st, 2013 we had dinner for my sister-in-law's birthday, which is tomorrow- or I should say in 2 hours from now (only 1 hour when I finally went to publish this post). I went out and bought each of us a helium filled balloon for the celebration part of the process. Some of us elected to only do the last part; I decided that I needed to sit and write out my responses for all three parts. 

My answers... 

It's now 9:50pm on December 31st, 2013 and time to reflect and complete it... 
My most significant contribution in 2013 would have to be my writing. This year I have discovered that more people than I thought, or ever anticipated, are impacted by my blogs and that is really remarkable for me. 
The one thing that has had the biggest positive impact in my life is by far my family and friends- sure we've had our moments but in the end these are the people who always push me to be better and constantly support my growth. 
I would like to acknowledge myself for having found a sense of balance between work and play. 
I would like to acknowledge my mother for making great strides, even if it's cause some major personal work for her, in her mission to provide for our family. 
The situation that caused me the most pain- had me balling my eyes out for the first time in a long time- was a blessing right away; it showed me that I am more ready to accept another into my life than I had previously thought. 
Thank you 2013 for bringing about much change, some challenges and lots of joy- overall 2013 has been a pretty solid year and I am grateful for all you brought. 

Time to create 2014...
The one thing I am implementing is taking time to honour and care for myself; my mind, body and soul. By feeding my mind with knowledge, by feeding my body with good food and caring for it through yoga and swimming, and finally by feeding my soul through writing, dancing and facilitating I will be able to continue in my sense of balance. 
I plan to continue to spend as much time as possible with my family and friends because they make me laugh, as long as I continue to make plans with them when I am home I will stay true to my heart and desire to stay connected.
If I suddenly had a million dollars I would travel purely for experience and bring people I loved with me. 
The contribution I want to make in 2014 is printing and talking about my book. I want people to read it and begin to get clarity about what they think and feel about sex. 
I would like my year of 2014 to be full of love, laughter and joy- I want to really allow myself to be vulnerable and open to receiving all that the universe has to offer me so that I may then give it back ten fold. 

I am grateful for my friends & family and I am now complete with 2013. 
I move towards 2014 with gratitude & vulnerability and am open to receive love & deep joy. 

Note: If you would like to complete these same questions here they are. 

My tradition is to write them out, by hand, on a piece of paper and then find a pretty box or decorate an envelop and keep it until next year... You could also have a burning ceremony if you want. For the celebration part I am all about a helium filled balloon and sending out the universe (until I plan it better and buy myself bio-degradable lanterns I apologize earth).

Sunday, December 22, 2013

Durex- I've got a bone to pick

Recently this commercial has been airing on TV again (I've been watching cheesy Christmas movies so it makes sense that I have seen this commercial about 20 times over the last few days). I enjoy the commercial until the end and then I get really pissed.

So Durex here's my bone- Why the F@$% does HE deserve this?! What about HER?!

I was so annoyed and angry that there was this implication that women are meant to serve or service the men in our lives. Like, I was really angry every time I saw it; to the point that I yelled at the TV a few times and my mom had to remind me that it's just a commercial and that the television could not in fact hear me.

I decided I was gonna write a blog post about it!

When I searched for this commercial online I could not find it on YouTube. I had to cast a bigger search net and finally found a webpage that had embedded the video. And I watched this one, which I had forgotten about:

And this one, although did not made me AS mad, also annoyed me!

So I understand that the commercials go back and forth between male and females talking, the thing that drives me NUTS is that if Durex is for Savvy Lovers that would mean that the best sex ever is for both people right?! So why, WHY couldn't they say, "WE deserve this.", "The best sex ever."

Sex, although it doesn't always involve a second person, these commercials are targeted to couples- two people. Which then makes me seriously wonder why they wouldn't use WE. Don't both people deserve the best sex ever? Why would it just be him or her? Aren't they both experiencing the sexual encounter together?

I just don't get it!!!

I do not often rant in my blogs but I just couldn't help it.

Wednesday, December 11, 2013

Santa is real at WestJet

Every now and then a company does something amazing and makes you believe in Santa! 

I fly all around North America regularly and I am always curious about the people I encounter on my journey. Some are excited to be going wherever they are headed, others are simply going from one place to another and others are clearly not happy to be sitting in an airport or on a plane. 

I will say as a frequent flyer it does not take much to make a flight a memorable one and come to think of it there are two key moments or flights I remember and both were with WestJet. 

The first was, as they scanned my boarding pass in Calgary for my flight back to Montreal the attendant actually addressed me by name and said, "Have a great flight"- I'm telling you; it's the small things that make all the difference! 

The second... Since I fly all the time I have gotten very skilled at falling asleep before the safety video or briefing ever even happens. Well one flight I just could not ignore. The West Jet flight attendant rhymed the whole safety briefing, like I'm talking Dr. Seuss rhymed! 

Now this video demonstrates another level of amazingness at WestJet. 

Please share this video because it is amazing and it is sure to melt the heart of even the coldest people then make their hearts grow two sizes!!! Also the more views this video gets the more kids WestJet will be able to help. 

We've gotta also give major props to the other companies like Best Buy that helped to make the miracle of this video happen. 

Tuesday, December 10, 2013

I like you. Do You Like Me?

Is there a right or wrong way of letting someone know that you are interested in them? Is it better to just come right out and say it; "I really like you. I have no idea what you are thinking but I just needed to let you know where I stand" OR "I really like you and would like to see where we can go from here." Or is that just wayyyyyy too much and it's better to just be a little more coy about it; you know dropping small hints but never just coming out and saying it?

I have tried both ways and they've got their pros and cons... Actually when I really think about it I've only ever really done the first way of just saying what I think and feel. As a matter of fact it's always in and around this point in easy hint dropping conversation land that I debate as to whether or not I should just say it; I've always just said it. 

I don't think a guy has ever come right out and said something like that to me. That being said maybe I've never really given any of them a chance to do so. 

So I come back to my original question... Is there a right or wrong way of letting someone know that you are interested in them? I mean excluding things such as stalking them. 

Men/guys; if a girl just said, "hey, I like you" would that be a thumbs up or down? Why? 

Women/girls; if a guy just said, "hey, I like you" would that be a thumbs up or down? Why? 

As I wrote the question for the guys nothing came up for me. Then as I re-typed it for the ladies a thought/ my own response to the question came in... 
If I was interested in them too it would be the best thing ever! If I was not interested in them I would likely feel a little awkward and uncertain of what to do or say next, especially if the guy is a friend whom I want to still be friends with even if he's not into me.

Re-reading everything I just wrote I remembered what it was like in elementary school. I googled the phrase "do you like me" and then hit images and a number of images appeared which were exactly what I was looking for to add to this blog!

And THEN as I continued to search I found the best one of all, which I realized is PERFECT for me!
Well okay maybe not perfect but I certainly think it's funny and part of it is very appropriate... other parts are a little extreme- you get the idea though! 

Friday, December 6, 2013

Great Read: "She Comes First"

Sex is one subject that every single person on this planet has in common. Wanna know how I know that? We are alive. Two people had sex, you won the race and were brought into this world.

Okay great. Now that we've established that let's talk about sex for a minute. How did you learn about it? Who taught you about sex? Women, did you know that the clitoris is the only human body part that's only purpose is to create pleasure? Men, did you know that?

I will not for one second pretend to know everything about sex. There is so much that I have not experienced and not learned about yet because, oh shocking- no one taught me about it. Now I am at a point in my life where I am comfortable enough with what I think, how I feel and what I want from sex that I can talk about it and ask about it and be really curious about it.

I have begun to talk about it more and more with different people and am discovering that it is something people really do want to talk about but don't always feel comfortable talking about. In talking to a friend about sex she recommended that I read this book; "She Comes First: The Thinking Man's Guide to Pleasuring a Woman" by Ian Kerner Ph.D.

I finished the book in about two days. I was so grateful to not feel like I was dysfunctional because I have never had an orgasm through penetration. Reading this book gave me more confidence that I really do know my body and what works for me. It also gave me more understanding of my body, how it's designed and what to expect or try. 

Women- I recommend reading this book for all of the reasons that I just mentioned above. 
Men- I recommend reading this book for the intimate knowledge about female anatomy and the elusive art of bringing a women to orgasm. Do not skip the first part of the book where he explains all the parts of the clitoral network and jump to technique- get the basics, he wrote the book perfectly to guide you through from start to finish. 

If talking about sex makes you uncomfortable I've been there. I am not even sure when I came to the decision to be more bold about it and ask questions and just talk about it but I have and I am glad because I know that there are people who need it. 

If you wanna talk about sex I am open to hearing your stories, your opinions and how you think and feel about it. I am curious about sex but more importantly I am curious about people. My objective in beginning these conversations is for people to become more confident in their own stance about sex.

Tuesday, December 3, 2013

No words

I realize that the title of this blog is odd considering that this is a blog and therefore would require words... I am going to do my best to put into words how I am feeling right now.

Today is the day that I celebrate my birth. I was born on this day 28 years ago at 5:58pm in Montreal, QC. (The time is not relevant until a little later) My birthday celebration began last night with my tradition of dinner with my family. People often ask what I want to do for my birthday and I feel like I am really boring because my answer is always the same; I want to have dinner with my family. I used to do a big dinner thing with my friends, or drinks with everyone but I realized that I prefer smaller gatherings and since my birthday falls into the holiday season chaos often I am really unattached to celebrating.

Dinner was wonderful. Just spending time with my family makes me smile, eating awesome food is a bonus! Today I spent much of the day on a plane or in an airport. I awoke nice and early to catch my first flight out on my way to Palm Springs for an event this week. People looked at my ID's all day but no one noticed that it was my birthday- I can't blame them, I normally have no idea what day of the week it is let alone what date. When I checked into my hotel I actually told the receptionist it was my birthday, something I never do. Well imagine my surprise when I return from my stint at the pool to find champagne, fruit and chocolate sauce waiting for me with a card from her!

I received something like 140 Happy Birthday messages from friends on Facebook or via text. some of the highlights though;

  • an amazing voice mail message from The Ofners, party of 5
  • a text from an incredible friend; "I know I missed it by 12 minutes, but happy technical 5:58pm birthday!"
  • "I hope you have a day that is filled with as much joy and happiness as you give those who have been blessed enough to have you in their lives"; from one very special lady
  • "Happy Birthday Beautiful!!! Because I love you, I'm giving you an all expense paid trip to...... PALM DESSERT!!! Starting NOW! Go!
    Have fun this week. Wish I was there to give you a birthday hug! xo"; from my amazing and clearly comedic boss! 
I really do not know how to use my words to say thank you. Thank you to each and everyone of you that is part of my life, whether you are a big piece of it, or a small part you are in my life and have made an impact on me. I am so incredibly grateful for all of you and for what I have. 

My words today are: THANK YOU, I LOVE YOU. 

PS. After I posted this blog I went for dinner. This is what my "bill" said:

Sunday, December 1, 2013

Gratitude, Relaxation and Connection...

I am currently sitting on a couch, looking out on a beautiful ski hill on this lovely cold December morning. (It's actually nice and toasty in the condo though)

My mom, Jaime- my youngest brother's girlfriend- and my best friend Geny left cold and grey Montreal yesterday morning for cold and 'whiter' Vermont. Yesterday we spent the day shopping. When we went through customs and the agent asked what we were going down for my mother responded, "A weekend of relaxation." He looked at us for a second before adding, "And shopping?" Clearly when you see a car of four women heading into the states on what's now become known as 'Black Friday Weekend' it's not hard to deduce that they will be shopping! He commented on how shopping now would not be considered relaxing, then said have fun and handed us back our passports and off we went.

I must say that when I am at home shopping is in NO way relaxing. However when I am on vacation I could spend a third of it shopping and I would be okay- half of it would just be too much. By the end of the day we were all ready to head to our home for the weekend which is tucked into the the bottom of the ski hill at Smuggler's Notch in Vermont. This area is very pretty all the time but with the light dust of snow that fell last night it's magical. I am beginning to feel a lot like Christmas :)

This is the time of year that I want to spend most with people I love and care about. Thank goodness for the internet which allows me to stay connected to others even if they live all around the world. While I was talking to a friend the other day he asked me if my family was all in one area or spread out, spread out is even an understatement! My family is all over the world; Montreal, Toronto, Ottawa (these are close'ish), New York, Rhode Island, San Francisco, Egypt and Dubai. And that's just my family- the people I love who are related my blood- my friends cover a MUCH larger span.

Technology, there are pros and cons to it but for me I am very grateful that it allows connections to stay powerful as long as you make an effort. I discovered, during my trip to NY this month, that I really do love to stay connected with people. I made a major effort to see as many people as I could while I was in NY, even if I haven't seen them for 6 or 7 years, because they mean something to me.

I may consider myself more introverted than extroverted but really I am pretty balanced. My work life requires a lot of my extroverted nature to come out so when I am not at work I tend to become a hermit. I hide away for a few days where I just re-connect with myself. I've discovered that this process is necessary for me if I want to be able to connect with anyone ever again! :)

Luckily for me I travel a lot to the cities in which my family and friends reside, with the exception of the ones not in North America. That means that coupled with the fact that I genuinely enjoy staying connected and seeing people I love and care about, I get to see my family more frequently than anyone else. At this time of year I am extra grateful for the job and the lifestyle that I have and the freedom that it allows me to stay connected with people I love.

Guess the lesson is this post is gratitude, relaxation and connection. Sometimes I don't have any thought provoking things to say... Happy Holiday season everyone! May it be filled with joy, love and laughter with people you love and care about!!!

(I only added the title after I wrote the post)